THE MAD ENGLISHWOMAN

Strange Happenings

Not all that strange as things go but still a bit odd for us. The boys and I went away for a few days holiday during half term. I mean actually away somewhere, not just lying around the house or going on day trips. The original plan was to get No. 2 son out of No. 1 son's way while he revised for his AS exams. Except No.1 son only had 1 exam after half term, most of them were before it. So, instead of staying home and revising, he came with us and we took the big tent instead of the little one.

We didn't go far, just to the Isle of Wight. We didn't go luxury, we camped. It was really good. Not only was it not very windy, but the sun shone all week. This has never happened before. Never in the history of the Madwoman camping with the kids has this happened. The longest sunny spell we have had before was 2 days. We always seem to get wind and/or rain when we go away. That's why the tent has a sewn in ground sheet, fewer draghts and less chance of waking up in a puddle. That's the theory. The tent needs a few minor repairs, replacement guy ropes and a coupld of replacement toggles but the biggest need is new tent pegs. We managed to bend almost all of them. The dry weather had made the ground incrediby hard. Once I have counted how many we will need no doubt we will be off to the camping shop to get some more. We are off to North Wales in August. Somehow I doubt we will have the same kind of problem.

Date posted: 12 Jun 2011

Not quite the relaxing summer I hoped for

That about sums it up. We ended the academic year with the threat of redundancies in our department. This soon turned out to not be a threat but reality. Two of our seven and a half members of teaching staff were made redundant. We all had to re-apply for our jobs and generally justify our existence. I was OK but it was a very stressful time

We started the summer holidays with himself in hospital. A fairly major infection which took a while to sort out kept him in for 10 days. My peaceful few days at home before the school holidays started didn't happen as I was in and out to the hospital, visiting and delivering supplies.

After that, I was working a couple of days every week to get things organised for the new academic year. My mother was here for a week but we didn't do much, which included several things I had meant to do. We have a new kitten (number 2 son's birthday present) which is fun but time-consuming, expecially cleaning up after it or chasing number 2 son to clean up after it.

Our main holiday was spent camping just south of the Lake District at Bolton-le-Sands. It was good, the first three days especially so, as it was warm and sunny and there was no wind! That last point is significant. By the Wednesday of our stay, the wind was getting up a bit. On the Thursday night I got very little sleep because of the noise. Not too worried about the tent falling down, but the noise was awful. Not only was everything flapping about but there was heavy rain as well. Even light rain makes a fair amount of noise on a tent roof. The boys, of course, slept through most of it, even number 2 son who managed to forget to do a BM before he had his bedtime snack and had a hypo about 10 minutes after he'd finished. So we were up quite late while he ate a couple of bowls of breakfast cereal. I woke him up every few hours to check he was actually asleep and not in a coma, but he was fine. The last night of our stay we came back to the tent after a day out and the back had blown in. One of the guys had snapped and the pegs across the back attaching it to the ground were out. Luckily we had some spare pegs so we double pegged the back and tied the guy together and survived the night. Another night without much sleep.

Number 1 son has been working a lot this summer. He has been doing split shifts and zooming back and forth on the train. He had a great time and is enjoying spending some of his income. Of course, it's not much fun for us when he phones at just after 11pm to say he's missed the last train (or it has been cancelled) and he needs to be collected (him and his bike - which is actually my bike). He got his GCSE results this week and they are OK. Not as good as we had hoped, but a lot better than we feared. We did the school supplies shopping this week, he starts 6th form in ten days time.

Number 2 son is just starting his GCSEs this year. It will be a tough couple of years all round because he's not known for doing homework or coursework so it could be a complete nightmare. Almost every negative comment on his reports for the last three years have been for lack of homework, now it's a lot more important. He wants to get better results than Number 1 son. It's possible, but not if he doesn't get his act together. We have still to get his school stuff sorted out, including new shoes which isn't easy, given he's a size 13 already, just like his brother.

At the moment my mother is in hospital having been admitted in the middle of the night by ambulance. Chest pains. It seems not to have been anything serious and she may go home today. I will still need to nip up there (over a 100 miles each way) to make sure she has everything she needs, like food and milk and to see that she's OK. Good timing Mum, I really need to be doing that on a Bank Holiday Weekend when the world and his family will be driving somewhere. I'm not even thinking about the M25 roadworks which took me almost an hour to get through last time I went.

I still have some things I need to sort out before starting back at work properly but they won't take long, I hope. I went in one day this week and did nothing but go to meetings and do student enrolments. I hate meetings!

Maybe next term will be a little less activity packed. I can hope I suppose.

Date posted: 28 Aug 2010

A difficult time

It has been a tough few weeks in the Madwoman's household. Himself's mother died suddenly on Easter Sunday. Basically her heart stopped. A nice way to go for her, but not so much fun for the family, especially for her oldest grandchild who went to see if she was alright and found her. That must have been really hard for him.

So, the funeral was arranged and of course we all went. All four of her children with their partners, all of her nine grandchildren and the older ones took their partners. The funeral was held at the church mother-in-law attended regularly and the minister spoke about how she made such a good contribution to the church community with her husband (who died some time ago) and in her own right. He talked about how their marriage had been a real partnership. He talked also about how important mother-in-law's Christian faith was to her and how she lived a good life. Lots of people got up and talked about how mother-in-law loved her family, her children and grandchildren. How she was a kind and generous person.

She loved her children so much that she only remembered two of the four in her will. Not as in she only left things to those two, but as in she only mentioned those two. There was not a single mention of any grandchildren, except in the case that one of the named children would fail to inherit, nor of her sister (who was so distressed that she was too ill to attend the funeral).

Not surprisingly, some people feel rather upset. Himself and I were not surprised to be left out since we never expected anything different, but having those expectations confirmed stung a bit. Not even being mentioned stung a bit more. We, and the other invisible family members, are not to receive even a momento to remember her passing or her existence.

The two offspring who were mentioned have decided to "honour" her memory. Fair enough. Except, I doubt that their children will get exactly what was left to them in the will, so I'm not quite convinced about the honouring bit.

One of the least thrilling experiences of my life was having to explain to my children that their Nana, despite what she said, and despite what was said at the funeral, really didn't care for them very much. It would have been nice not to have had to explain it, but they are Facebook friends with their cousins and some of those cousins were very angry at the way their parents had been treated and said so. Personally I think that anybody can leave their money to anyone or anything they want, it's their money, but obviously a quarter share in something has to be better than a kick in the teeth. I'm glad we didn't have to jump through the hoops that the others did to get included. Mind you, going to watch football with your mother once a week (unless something more interesting comes along) isn't that difficult, especially if you aren't going to be allowed to watch football at home, but I digress.

Betrayal is word that keeps popping into my mind. That woman betrayed everybody, the beneficiaries and the others. What she didn't do was betray her relationship with her long dead spouse, he dominated her right to the end, and she let him.

Date posted: 09 May 2010

Are these people real?

A friend directed me to this article

I know it's aimed at Americans, but really, how daft do you have to be to feed your kids some of the muck they are talking about? I doubt it's just an American problem. Do people not read the writing on the side of the packet? All those years getting decent labelling on packets of processed foods and people don't bother to read them. This article puched so many buttons for me that I don't know where to start.

"Ditch the kids' yogurt and replace it with simple, real, wholesome yogurt not marketed as a "fun" food or to kids."

How about "don't buy any food marketed as being fun for kids". Now, that's a novel idea, letting kids eat real food. I don't see whe people think feeding kids has to be fun or difficult or anything. My kids ate pretty much the same as us right from their first solids. Now No. 1 son eats almost anything and No. 2 son eats most things. They are not picky eaters, and we must have saved hundreds of pounds by not buying special food. If I am not prepared to eat something then I'm certainly not going to offer it to my children.

"Can the instant oatmeal and instead opt for whole oats you can microwave."

They mean porridge. What's wrong with cooking it in a saucepan? It'll taste nicer, the texture will be better, and you won't have to scrape dried-on porridge from inside the microwave either.

"Be picky about the peanut butter you choose and pick the brands with fewer ingredients."

The peanut butter I buy has only one ingredient, peanuts. I don't get putting other things into it. Why would you? I once accidentally bought some American peanut butter. One mouthful and I spat it out, talk about disgusting. What kind of moron puts sugar in peanut butter? No wonder kids are getting fat if they have sugar in everything.

I always used to read the labels on processed food, because I want to know what I am eating. Now, with No. 2 son a type 1 diabetic that has become even more important. Too much food has too much sugar in it. Low fat foods are positively toxic in many cases because of what they put in to replace the flavour and bulk provided by the fat. In terms of processed food I buy bread, soups, some breakfast cereal (the 100% wholemeal sort or porridge), butter, cheese and whole milk greek-style yoghurt, jam and marmalade, some cooked meats like ham and so on and the occasional pack of sausages and cans of soup, tuna, tomato and baked and other processed beans like borlotti beans and chick peas. That's pretty much it. Meat and vegetables are fresh or frozen, and I cook our dinner from scratch almost every night and I know what's in it. There is nothing difficult about this, it doesn't take any longer to cook a dinner for 4 people than to cook one dinner for children and a different dinner for adults and there's a whole lot less washing up. That could be a new slogan "Save the planet - feed your kids real food."

Date posted: 04 Mar 2010

As good a time to start as any

The new year started with a bang in the Madwoman's household. Onfortunately it wasn't celebratory fireworks.

Himself, having been living with a dormant malignant melanoma in his eye for a few years was told that the melanoma had somehow managed to reattach itself to a blood supply and was growing. The only option really was to remove the whole eye and the cancer with it. He was in and out of hospital within 3 days. The surgeon says they got the whole tumour out and there was no evidence that it had spread elsewhere. At the moment we are waiting for an appointment for a prosthetic eye that isn't blank. Himself has to wear an eye patch when he goes out so as to avoid scaring small children and making people feel a bit icky. We are used to it now, but it's going to be Easter before the new "eye" is ready.

All this was going on in late January, some time after the Madwonan's mother fell and cracked her head open on a door. It was on the first day we had really heavy snow round here, but this was an indoor accident. The police had to use their big red key to get in. Luckily the worst damage was to the doors. A few days in hospital and 7 stitches later and mother was returned home, somewhat shaky still, but definitely on the mend. As to how she managed to pass out in the first place, the jury is still out. It wasn't a stroke, that much is certain as they have tested and scanned and poked everything that might tell them. The current theory is that it was a stress reaction, so now she's on tranquilisers and sedatives and whatnot. If nothing else Mum is sleeping better than she was, which has to be a good thing.

On the home front No. 1 son trundled happily through his GCSE mock exams and decided which A levels he wants to do and where he wants to do them. The current selection is Drama, Spanish, French and English with Critical Thinking as the top-up. He is worried that the school won't want him to go back if his results aren't good enough so is now doing some work. The other option was to do Music, but all the slacking off has taken its toll and his Music teacher won't have him until he's at Grade 5 in at least one instrument. Even then she won't be very happy.

No. 2 son did his SATs. On the basis of no visible work and no revision he came 11th out of all the kids in his year in Science and achieved level 7 in Maths. Brat. Feedback from Parent's Evening is that he's bright but lazy and disorganised. No change there then. He has chosen his GCSE subjects now, I dread to think what he is going to do about his coursework.

The Madwoman herself has just moved buildings at the place she works. It's an educational establishment so of course moving offices and classrooms and equipment across from one building to another during term time and half way through the academic year is a brilliant idea (not). I have no idea which moron came up with that plan, but you may be surprised to learn that all did not go according to plan and chaos reigns. It wouldn't be so bad but exactly the same thing happened last academic year.Some people never learn. Oh well, the washing and ironing are still with us, not that I do a great deal of the latter, just look at the ironing basket and think I might get round to it one day, but not today.

Date posted: 28 Feb 2010

It's a Parent thing

No. 1 son is late home. He has been on a trip to the Schools Prom at the Royal Albert Hall. He told me he was going to be back at school by 11pm. Then this afternoon he phoned and said that he would be dropped off in the town here and not have to go the extra miles to school. That's good. I checked the times, the concert isn't scheduled to end until 10pm. It is now almost midnight and not a word, though they'd be doing well to leave there at 10pm and get back here by now. He's not answering his phone. So of course, being a parent, I'm getting stressed.

Worst case scenario is that some disaster has befallen the Royal Albert Hall and everbody is dead, but we haven't seen the news so we don't know. Next worse case, some disaster has befallen the coach and everybody is dead and the police haven't got to us yet, so we don't know. Next worse case the coach is broken down and they are stranded miles away, or maybe he's fallen asleep and is now at school on his own wondering where we are and can't phone us because his phone battery had run flat or he's lost his phone.

Of course what's really happened, most likely, is that they are actually almost here and he's asleep and somebody will wake him up just in time for him to phone and say "come and collect me". It's what parents are for isn't it, worrying about what might happen to our kids.

Date posted: 10 Nov 2008

Well, I'm not very popular

No. 1 son wants to have a friend over this weekend for a sleepover. Initially we said he could but today we remembered that next week he has module exams for Maths, Physics, Chemistry and Biology, so we changed our minds. No. 1 son is already tired and needs to get some rest and do some revision. He isn't happy. It's all a plot to make him unhappy and we are treating him like he's an idiot. Shame. Which is more important - a night spent watching old "Dr Who" episodes or sleeping and revising? He didn't seem very impressed when we told him that if he didn't do well in the exams he would be paying for the re-sit himself. The week after next he's got Spanish and French oral exams as well, so it'll be a long time before he has any friends to sleep over. What wicked parents we are!

Date posted: 06 Nov 2008

Life goes on

I was at my cousin Lizzie's funeral yesterday. Not a bad day, as things go. Since my cousin died I have been thinking back remembering some of the things we did as children. I can remember her right back to when I was about 4 years old. They came to visit and I remember being quite fed up because I was sent to bed and she wasn't. When I was a bit older we used to go to Southend, where my aunt and uncle lived, on the bus. Simple trip since the bus passed the end of our road and went all the way to Southend and no changes. It was a relatively cheap day out at the seaside I suppose. Another time we went as a family to visit and my uncle took us all out for a walk somewhere, no idea where, but there were fields and fields of peas and we walked for what seemed like miles, munching on freshly picked peas as we went. That was a good day. I remember Lizzie and Sue were there then. Later on we used to see something of Pete, Lizzie's older brother, and his family but Lizzie was married and busy with her own family then. That's the way it goes. Somehow the world seems a different, slightly worse, place today than it did before Lizzie left it. There's a difference between "we will get together sometime soon"and knowing that chance of that has gone forever.

I have included a link in the side bar to what we refer to as "Lizzie's charity" Lizzie was a very positive life force, and the people whose lives she touched are the better for it, no doubt about that. Her life wasn't what you would conventionally call "easy" but she lived it and she lived it well. The injuries she received in her accident in 1993 probably contributed to her untimely death, but she herself said she wouldn't go back. Lizzie was a great believer in moving on, and she certainly did that. Of course she left a lot of people saddened by her passing; a lot of people rocked back on their heels and wishing they had said or done something before, while they still had the chance. Lots of people loved her, lots of people admired her and she will never be replaced, but her legacy lives on in the work she did and in her family, partner children and grandchildren. Talking to one of her sons yesterday I could see Lizzie in him, not in looks but in attitude. That's the bit of Lizzie that will go on through the generations and out into the wider world through TBPI and the people who support her work in that. Our loss is the world's loss, but we have all gained by knowing Lizzie.

So, if you thinking that you should phone, or arrange to meet, or write to somebody you haven't seen for ages do it now. You never know. Do it in tribute to a lovely lady, and because you can, because it's not, now, too late but tomorrow it might be.

Date posted: 24 Oct 2008

Families - all different

I had a phone call from my mother tonight. That in itself is odd, so as soon as I heard her voice I knew it wasn't good news. She seldom phones us and never at mealtimes unless it's an emergency. That's not to say that we never talk on the phone I phone her practically every night at around her bedtime.

What Mum wanted was to ask if I had a phone number for one of my cousins. His sister died yesterday and his other sister was trying to get in touch with him and didn't have his phone number. While I'm sad at the loss of my cousin, I can't say we were very close. It's a shock of course, she wasn't much older than me, maybe 5 years or so, but but we haven't seen each other apart from weddings and funerals since we were children. What does depress me is that my cousins, brother and sisters, didn't keep in better touch with each other and didn't manage to get along better. I can't imagine not having contact with my sister. We don't see each other very often since we live at opposite ends of England (I'm in the south-east and she's in the north-west) but we keep in touch by email and phone and we get together when we can. I guess that's just how we are.

You hear stories of extended families who still all live in the same street or district and who see each other every day. Our extended family isn't like that any more, it has scattered. We started off all living in the same area of North London and now none of us lives there. Quite a few in Hertfordshire and East Anglia, but now also in Sussex, Hampshire, Cornwall, Lincolnshire, Staffordshire, Lancashire, Spain, Ireland and Australia. I somehow doubt we are much different from any other 20th century family really, but gone are the days when we could walk from our house to visit our grandparents or any of our aunts and uncles.

So while I am sorry about the loss of my cousin, I suppose what I am mourning is the loss of that extended family and how easy it is for people become estranged from each other.

Date posted: 17 Oct 2008

Happy Returns

No. 2 son has been away on a school trip this week. Him and almost all of his year at school. They have been in France, not very far from Calais but still quite a distance. He had a fantastic time, which we knew he would if he managed not to kill himself. No. 2 son is diabetic and this was the first time he's been completely responsible for all his own medication (well almost completely responsible his head of year and form tutor both went on the trip and nagged him). He did very well and came home in one piece, though I'm not sure how the three other boys he was sharing with coped with having him around all the time.

When he left he was wearing a grey t-shirt under a red and grey stripy jumper and a pair of navy blue jogging bottoms. When he came back he was wearing the same jogging bottoms (now navy blue and mud coloured), the same jumper and a blue t-shirt. When he unpacked his bag I noticed that he seems to have changed his socks and his underpants at least twice but only 1 of the t-shirts he took with him was dirty (if you discount the one he was wearing when he left, which apparently became his pajama top). Whatever, the whole lot are now in the washing machine.

They did lots of interesting and fun things on the trip. I phoned him or he phoned me every night. The conversation on his last night went as follows:

Me: Hello

Him: Hello. What did you want?

Me: Just checking that you are OK.

Him: I'm OK

Me: That's fine then. Good night.

Him: Good night

End of conversation. Of course since he got home he's hardly stopped talking, but is now heading for bed as it's already past his bedtime of 9pm. No. 2 son came back a changed boy, in a nice way. he seems a bit more mature, a bit more grown up. He's certainly more confident and a bit more independent. That's good.

I have to give a huge vote of thanks to all the staff who went on the trip. I certainly wouldn't want to spend a whole week surrounded by 120 12 year old boys. But they managed it and came back looking remarkably serene. It made me think though. We just entrusted our son's life to people we hardly know because we trust them. We trust them because they are teachers. We wouldn't do that with any other group of people.

We had several lots of "second thoughts" about the whole trip but we don't want to make him different because of the diabetes and his brother did pretty much the same trip when he was in year 8 so we couldn't not let him go. Just a week or so before No. 2 son left I had a conversation with a friend (who didn't at that time know about the trip). She claims that she has never let her 12 year old son go more than an hour's travelling time away from her. Never. She worries about him, she worries that something might happen. He's at no more risk of something happening to him 2 hours or 3 hours away than he is standing right beside her. He could step out of his front gate and get hit by a lorry. They live in America so he could get shot while he's at school. It happens. What we can't do is let our fears (can we say paranoia?) get in the way of our children's development into sensible self-reliant adults. If they are never exposed to any risks they never learn to assess risk, they never learn to respond sensibly to risky situations. My friend's child, as far as I can tell, is a sensible boy. He's not an idiot but he needs to broaden his experience. My friend probably thinks I'm mad to let any child of mine go so far away from home. I think she's mad not to give him as many opportunities and experiences as possible, even if it means him being a long way from home.

Date posted: 10 Oct 2008

The Dreaded Lurgy Strikes

It's that time of year again. The cold germs are going mad and everybody is getting them. They laid waste to our family last week. We shared between us a particularly vicious virus that made everybody miss at least one day off work/school. Nasty. Luckily we are all getting back to normal now. Even more luckily for me the worst days I had were at the weekend, if they had happened during the week I would have had to miss work and if I don't work I don't get paid. Not that I am getting paid at the moment. The bozo organisation for whom I do a lot of supply work hasn't organised itself well enough to actually pay me for the work I did for them in September. If I hadn't been working for them then I would no doubt have been working elsewhere and they would have paid me. Surprising though it may seem there are some supply teaching agencies who not only find me work (I found my current contract myself) but also pay me for it. Now that kind of arrangement I can live with. Not getting paid stinks!

Date posted: 06 Oct 2008

We really don't need this

"Parents will be able to ask if someone close to their family is a sex offender under new pilot schemes in England.Under the measures, police will be able to tell families if someone with access to a child has convictions or has been previously suspected of abuse." This from the BBC website

Have we taken leave of our senses? It seems like it only takes one guilt-ridden parent to get the government to take away even more of any right to privacy we may have. I mean, look at it. Notice the bit that says "had previously been suspected of". This means that innocent people (and do I mean innocent since they haven't been convicted of anything and indeed they may not have been prosecuted because there was no evidence that they had done anything wrong) who come into contact with children can have other people going to the police and asking for information about them.

Imagine the case where little Timmy's parents have heard a rumour about somebody they see maybe at school or maybe walking their dog in the park or who is the parent of little Timmy's friend. So Timmy's parents go to the Police and say "This person has unsupervised contact with my child, please tell me about them" and the Police (who probably haven't got the time or resources to check that the person really does have access to little Timmy say "Oh yes Mr/Mrs X was suspected of having done something naughty to a child twenty years ago but nothing was proved and they were never charged with anything and the charges were withdrawn". Little Timmy's parents tell little Timmy not to go near Mr/Mrs X and even if they don't tell little Timmy why little Timmy makes a guess and tells his mate Johnny and Johnny tells his parents what Timmy's parents said and suddenly Mr/Mrs X gets beaten up because little Johnny's dad or mum says there's no smoke without fire and tells Janie's mum and she tells somebody else and somebody takes it into their own hands to "teach this pervert a lesson".

It's insane, it's dangerous, and it doesn't do one darn thing to keep our kids safer because it just makes it more likely that sex offenders and people who are a threat to the safety of our kids will just vanish from police and probation service radar and nobody will ever know who they are or where they are. People who have offical contact with kids (teachers, playleaders, people who run clubs and other activities for kids) are routinely checked for criminal offences. In my job I get checked for almost every new school I go to (at a cost of 36 quid each time somebody's making an awful lot of money out of this), it's a pain but it's necessary. Even so, an expired conviction (not that I have any convictions for anything, expired or not) doesn't automatically get you barred from formal contact with kids but as far as I can tell, once suspected of any kind of inappropriate contact with kids then always a "pervert" even when there's no proof, no evidence and no conviction.

If we really want to keep our kids safe then this isn't the way to do it.

Date posted: 15 Sep 2008

Mum's Rules

Devised by me for the smooth running of the household and the continued survival of parents and offspring. They come in several sections.

When you get up
  1. Take your tablets.
  2. Get dressed - even if you aren't planning on going anywhere. Pajamas are not day clothes.
  3. Brush your teeth and wash your face every day.
  4. No playing games before school.
  5. Eat breakfast.
  6. If Mum says the kitchen's closed, then it's closed, and you have to get your own breakfast - no arguing.
When you get home from school
  1. Take your school uniform OFF, fold it up neatly and put it where it won't get creased up or dirty (this means not on the floor).
  2. Put your dirty shirt in the washing as soon as you take it off.
  3. Unpack your bag and hand over any notes from school.
  4. Put your lunch box in the kitchen.
  5. No TV or games until homework is finished.
  6. Do homework the day it is given, not the day before it is due in (unless they are the same).
  7. First person home cooks dinner. See kitchen noticeboard to find out what it is you have to cook.
Before bed
  1. Sort your school bag out for the next day (if you are going to school the next day).
  2. Clean your teeth.
  3. Turn off your computer.
  4. If it's not a school day tomorrow turn your alarm clock OFF!
  5. Make sure you have clean underwear ready for the morning.
At mealtimes
  1. Come to the table fully dressed.
  2. One fork full or one spoon full = one mouth full.
  3. If you have food in your mouth keep your mouth closed. No talking, no putting more food in until your mouth is empty.
  4. Chew!
At other times
  1. Do not fight.
  2. If what you are wearing is not good enough to answer the door in then it's not good enough to sit round at home in.
  3. If you use the last one/bit of whatever it is - replace it, do not leave the empty container lying around.
  4. If you get the last one/packet of whatever it is out from the cupboard or off the shelf - write it on the shopping list.
  5. If you drop it, you pick it up.
  6. If you got it out, you put it away.
  7. If you turned it on, you turn it off (this applies especially to the bathroom light and the TV).
  8. On the floor is not the same as "put away".
  9. If you spill it, you clean it up (this includes stuff that myteriously gets on the floor when you are cooking).
  10. Do not hit him (unless you are both kitted out in fencing gear and you are on the piste).
  11. Keep out of your brother's bedroom.
  12. If you cook something share it.
  13. Don't eat the last one - it's Mum's.
  14. If you aren't sure, ask someone.
  15. If there's nobody around to ask then think what the normal answer might be if you did ask and do that. If in doubt, "No you can't" is the normal answer.
  16. If Mum or Dad tell you to do (or stop doing) something, do it - now is good.
  17. No poking fingers up your nose in public (regardless of how juicy the bogey is). Mum counts as public.
  18. Keep all digits out of your mouth (this include toes).
  19. No cooking when there are no adults in the house.
  20. If Mum or Dad say it's your turn then it's your turn - even if it isn't.
  21. Do not booby trap the downstairs toilet.
  22. Put dirty clothes in the washing pile, if it's not in the washing pile it won't get washed.
  23. Empty toilet roll inners go in the bin, not on top of the radiator.
  24. Your bed, you make it.
  25. Your decision. You live with it.

I think that covers most situations for our family but this is more a work in progress than a definitive list. It follows on from a guide for new Mums that some friends and I devised when our own babies (all born around the same time) were tiny.

Date posted: 04 Sep 2008

Back home

We finally got home a couple of days ago. While we were away I drove over 900 miles, which was quite scary. Luckily the fuel economy wasn't too bad, average was 65 mpg, which is lower than usual but then I had a top box and a full car to contend with. It took 2 tanks full of diesel to get us there and back. Comparing that to the cost of doing everything by public transport (if public transport exists for where you want to go) it's pretty good going. That's without working out how to transport sufficient camping equipment for 3 people for a week as well.

Of course it rained every day we were away, and most nights as well. The campsite was muddy all the time we were there. The first two nights we hardly got any sleep (though probably more than we thought) because of the noise of the rain and the wind. I say "we" but that's me and No. 1 son. No. 2 son slept though the whole thing. After that the weather calmed down a bit and there was less rain and more sleeping going on, but it never got really hot. This was probably a good thing.

We hardly went into any tourist type shops, though we visited several tourist areas - in the Lake District how can you not? We were with my mother, sister and brother-in-law and their son most of the time. We don't see my sister and her family very much as they live so far away so it was good to be able to spend time with them.

Highlights of the trip for the boys were visiting a cave somewhere between Caton and Dent and our day round WIndermere when we visited Bowness and fed the birds and then walked up Gommer's How. I wasn't sure I was going to make it, but I did a bit, then the next bit and then the next bit and then I was there. I need to get more exercise! The boys are already talking about a "next time" and I'm sure there will be one, though it would be nice not to have to stomp everywhere in wellies and waterproofs.

The whole camping experience was better than I expected, having known in advance that it was going to rain I thought we would be colder and damper. The campsite we stayed on was on a working organic farm. Only basic facilities were available and that was fine. We didn't want to go to one of the bigger all singing, all dancing campsites - there didn't seem to be much point. Of course they are also much more expensive, which might have had something to do with it. We had read the reviews of the campsite beforehand and followed the advice. We pitched with the back of the tent close to the hedge with the prevailing wind behind us. Not that we could have determined the prevailing wind when we arrived since it was quite still. We didn't get the views down Morecombe Bay but we did get the views up the valley and into the Lake District.

Lessons learned?

Since we got back we have been remarkably idle. Of course having the Olympics on every morning doesn't help. More about that another time. The boys have been pottering around doing a bit of this and a bit of that. They went to the cinema a couple of times and have had friends round to play. No.1 son and I have an appointment with the BBC on Monday (Bank Holiday) to play in the Proms Family Orchestra. We are looking forward to that.

Before we went away I recall mumbling something about Russian Imperilalism. I wonder just how many Hungarians are remembering when the Russians sent "peacekeepers" to their country. It took a while to get rid of them if I recall. Looks like Georgia is beginning to have a similar problem. What else could we expect with Puppetmaster Putin's attitude. I just can't work out if he's planning to become King or President for life (and don't tell me the Constitution doesn't allow it - they can be changed). Either way I'm glad we live a way distant from Russia and don't depend on them for oil or gas supplies. If I was Polish I wouldn't be sleeping well in my bed. What the West needs to remember is that in Russia they growp up playing chess, not baseball.

Date posted: 20 Aug 2008

Best Laid Plans

This weekend didn't quite go according to plan. Not that we are great for planning round here anyway, but this weekend we had definite plans. They didn't exactly come to fruition.

On Friday we had only one plan for the weekend. No1. son and I were going to the Proms Folk Day on Sunday as we were accepted for the orchestra again this year. We didn't get there. Long(ish) story. Last weekend No.1 son had a mishap on his bike and removed a quantity of skin from the side of his calf. By Thursday it was quite clearly infected so on Friday I yanked him in to see the Doctor. Yep. It's infected, take these antibiotics come back if it doesn't get better in a week.

So on Saturday we do this and that, the usual domestic round of laundry, cooking, cleaning and so on. No.1 son went to the cinema with his friends to see "Hancock" rather than go an play tennis. On the way there on his bike his foot slips off the pedal and the pedal whacks him on the leg - guess where! He came home with his sock (my sock actually - he takes almost the same size shoe as I do and so scrounges my socks when he can't find any of his own) covered in blood and gunge. At least the gunge was out of the thing on his leg. He's all scabby but otherwise his leg is getting better.

We did some preparation for out outing. No. 2 son was staying at home with Himself. They had things to do - there was talk of having a friend over to play and revision for a test on Tuesday. So at 6:30 on Sunday morning we were all up so that No. 1 son and I could leave at 7:30 get to where we were going in London by 9:30ish to start rehearsals by 10am. At 6:45 No. 1 son disappeared into the bathroom and didn't come out. The world was falling out of his bottom. When we investigated further it seems that this is a known but not very common side-effect of the antibiotics he is taking. He came out of the bathroom at about 7am and was back in my 7:15. Which was when I decided we weren't going to London. It's a 2 hour drive (probably a bit less that early on a Sunday am) and no easy access to toilets on the way. Also, with a live performance in Kensington Gardens at lunchtime, he's not going to be able to get off the stage in a hurry if he needs to. So we stayed home.

At lunchtime we were thinking about going to see Prince Caspian at our local cinema. No. 2 son was wearing the same scruffy clothes he was wearing yesterday and I told him to get changed, but he decided he couldn't get changed because he hadn't got any clean clothes and it was all my fault! Except there were clean clothes in his room. I knew this because I put them there on Friday when he was out - and he would have had to move them off his bed before he went to bed. So he knew it too. Anyway after a few words here and there No. 2 son lost it big time and was throwing a major strop. No. 1 son edged past him to get his jacket and No. 2 son was yelling that No. 1 son had deliberately hurt his foot (No. 2 son had an accident on Thursday and twisted his foot, it's sore but no major damage - and No. 2 son has been known to forget which foot has been hurt and limp on the wrong foot so we aren't taking a lot of notice). I saw what happened and nothing came into contact with No. 2 son's foot. Long story short, No. 2 son is banished to his room and I refuse to take either of them to see "Prince Caspian". In any case I can't somehow get excited about this new film. "The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe" was OK but not as good as I had hoped. Not as bad as I had feared either, but it didn't have me beating a path to the cinema doors to see "Prince Caspian".

Later on No. 1 son and I went to see Wall-e, which was good fun. No. 1 son managed to get through with only 1 dash out. We didn't tell No. 2 son we were going. He was grounded so there was no way he was going anywhere and had shut himself up in his room. He was pretty fed up that we went but accepted that throwing a major strop like that was a good enough reason for not taking him. His blood sugar was quite high and we know he's what is called an "angry hyper" but he must learn to control it better (temper and blood sugar both).

We were going to have a barbeque for dinner. It was quite nice outside when No. 1 son lit it, but by the time it got going enough to cook on, clouds had come over and the wind was up so it wasn't all that great. We decided that instead of eating outside we'd eat inside. That decision was vindicated when it started to rain! No. 2 son and I were out there rescuing burgers (home made) and chicken drumsticks in the rain. Cooked indoors as well as ate indoors.

Only three more days at school for the boys, though quite a lot of schools seem to be finished already. Somehow, with No. 1 son and No. 2 son spending half their time bickering and half their time being friends I'm not quite looking forward to the school holidays as much as I should. I will be here with them all of the time, at least Himself gets to go back to work after the first couple of weeks!

Date posted: 21 Jul 2008

It's amazing

how long it can take to just do a simple thing. Bedtime for the boys is, at least in theory, 9pm. By that time they should both be in bed, though No. 1 son often sits up reading after he's actually in bed. He probably doesn't need as much sleep as No.2 son. So tonight we had dinner early so they should both be in bed in plenty of time. Did it happen? Nope.

At about 8:30 No.1 son comes and asks that I cut his hair. We have a set of those clippers which mean that even I can manage to produce a halfway decent looking trim. It's not what you might call styling but it's tidy, which is all I ask and all No.1 son wants. Of course by the time I'd actually finished it was almost 9pm and he was all hairy so he needed a bath. No. 2 son came and did his BM and then somehow managed to watch some TV. Then he was hungry and wanted to eat. Of course with him being diabetic that wasn't the best idea on the planet. He's just switched to a new insulin regime and hasn't quite got it organised yet so we are tying to impose a bit of routine until everything is under control. He just had an appointment with the Consultant yesterday and the message is quite clear - no more snacks. He ate some cheese (low carbohydrate and likely to fill you up relatively fast) and that seemed to be OK. So what with that and No.1 son's bath, and then quelling rebellion on the reading in bed front it was well past 10pm by the time I got No.2 son to bed.

Tomorrow No.1 son has some kind of presentation to do as part of his business project. That's why he wanted his hair cut. He's been flitting about doing last minute things for that, though why he had to leave them until after bedtime is anybody's guess. He was mumbling something about somebody was supposed to have sent him an electronic copy of their presentation so he could practice, so it might have been that. Anyway, 2 hours after bedtime they are actually both in bed and lying down. Not sure how No.1 son will be in the morning. He scraped a sizeable chunk of skin off his leg at the weekend. It was bleeding quite a lot on Monday night (he pulled his fencing socks over the bandage and it rubbed badly) but now it seems to be starting to go septic. The whole house smells of antiseptic stuff now. We will have to keep an eye on that.

I have been working 3 days per week in what they call a Skills Studio. Working with kids who are doing vocational courses (construction, motor vehicle etc) that their schools can't offer. It has been quite good fun but today was my last day there. I wouldn't mind going back on a long-term basis, if they were to increase the pay. The location itself is on the edge of town so it's easy to get to from where I live, less than 30 minutes most days. The drive is quite pleasant as well, a quick bit of dual carriageway and then 5 miles or so cross-country. It has been interesting watching things change over the 5 weeks I have been there. When I started the fields were mostly green - even the wheat fields. By today one of the wheat fields had been harvested and many of the others were brown or almost brown. An interesting colour not quite ripe wheat, not brown and not green. The crops were also taller. When I started I could easily see over them at the small junction where I get to the last small bit of my travels. Today I couldn't I had to stretch up quite a bit to see clearly. I'm lucky to live in a place where such things are possible. I grew up in the middle of London (more or less) and I don't want to live there any more. Here I still live in a town but it's easy to get out of it.

Date posted: 16 Jul 2008

They got something Right!

Or Have They?. There was an item on the morning news programme on the BBC today about how some parents are allegedly "confused" about whether they can leave their children at home alone. This issue raises its ugly head every year. Parents work, kids are off school, what is a parent supposed to do? Of course they got the usual prat "If you can't look after your children until they are 16 years old then you shouldn't have them" who quite fails to grasp the reality of life these days. My kids will be paying for that person's NHS treatment and their pensions when they have retired. With the way the economy is these days and has been for years the number of people who can afford to stay at home with their kids is tiny. I wish I could, but having had the kids it is my responsibility to make sure that they are fed and have a roof over their heads, to do that I have to go to work.

Anyway, back to the point. Some children's charity (of course nobody would suspect them of having a vested interest in this - not) has asked for specific legal guidelines because at the moment there aren't any and parents are "confused". How the heck can you be confused about whether it is safe to leave your kids unsupervised or not? I mean, they are your kids. You should know them well enough to be able to determine if it's safe. With us we have sometimes left No. 1 son at home on his own for maybe an hour or two at a time since he was about 11 years old. We checked back with him by phone quite a lot but he was OK and we were OK. He knew that he could go to a neighbour's house if he wasn't happy. We wouldn't do that for No. 2 son even now and he's 12. No. 1 son is a bit of a scaredy cat and also quite thoughtful. He thinks before he acts and is generally aware of safety in a way that the other one doesn't and isn't. Not that No. 2 son is a risk taker but he gets focused in on a task and gets carried away and then he gets into trouble or awkward situations. What we wouldn't do is leave them at home together for any length of time without permission to play computer games and watch TV as much as they like. When they are together they bicker and fight, games and TV at least keeps them in separate rooms or gives them something they can do together without bickering and fighting. It's enough of a rarity that they don't want that privilege taken away and they behave.

Of course what this is really about is fear and, sickeningly, it's not fear that something might happen to your child when they aren't supervised, but that somebody (read Social Services or some children's charity or some other bunch of interfering no-good time wasters who can't get a real job and who have nothing better to do) will take your children away for no reason because you can't point to a law that says' it's OK. That's the scary thing.

This is the real reason we have feral children. Parents are so scared by Social Services and the do-gooders that they won't discipline their children in case "somebody" complains and the children are taken into care.

Every so often we get stories in the press about kids who were taken into care for no real reason, because somebody thought that something had happened that hadn't and then refused to listen to sense, or fact or anything else. We hear about people who have their kids taken into care on the basis of no evidence at all and then are threatened that if they talk about it with anybody they will never see their kids again. It takes a lot of guts and real desperation before anybody will go against that. You could end up in prison for contempt of court and then Social services have a "reason" for taking your kids away because now you have a criminal record. Social Services have targets for adoptions. They have a target number of adoptions they have to process each year. If nobody wants the kids they have already got in care (or if social services deem the available parents unsuitable because they aren't the "right" colour) it seems like they go and find some child that they can, basically, steal so that they hit their targets.

The law is fine as it is. What we need to change is the attitude of some parents and most Social Service departments. The key part of the name I would suggest is the second part Service. They are paid, by us, to Serve, not to hinder, not to terrify, not to threaten, not to bully but to serve. If they concentrated on doing their job properly maybe parents could concentrate on doing their job of parenting and we wouldn't have so many problems.

Date posted: 11 Jul 2008

A bit of an odd week

It has been a strange week in lots of ways. Probably because the weekend went by so fast. I have been having a clear out and have listed tons of stuff on ebay and on Amazon. I spent most of the weekend doing that I think. Taking pictures, uploading them, writing descriptions and so on. The usual stuff really. The boys have been quite busy but still at home which in itself is unusual. Often they will go out with their friends at the weekend, swimming or to the skate park or to the park to play tennis. This weekend the weather was a bit iffy and they wanted to watch the tennis, not play it, so they stayed at home. I was supposed to be listing stuff on Sunday afternoon, but the TV was on and I was watching the tennis at the same time. I had to stop listing and sit and watch in the end. That was I think what everytbody was hoping for (well possibly not Federer and Nadal). A fantastic match with some really great tennis that actually went the distance. I'm sure Roger Federer wasn't the only one who breathed a sigh of relief when he won the third set, it was such a good match I just wanted it to last longer. Well we certainly got our wish there. The boys had to sit up past their bedtime to see the end, but on a one-off occasion like that they are sometimes allowed. It would have been cruel to send them to bed at their usual 9pm. After all that great tennis we also got a couple of good interviews. Such grace from both men, absolute respect for their opponent and not even a hint of anything other than great sportsmanship and both of them speaking in a foreign language. Something to be learned for all of us I think. Now of course I am looking forward to a re-match in the final next year.

Congratulations too to Laura Robson. I pointed out to No 1 son that if he wants to be a great tennis player then it's probably already too late! Then tonight on local TV an item about two small children, sisters, who are both the best in the county for their age. Of course they say they want to be just like Venus and Serena Williams, which isn't surprising. I wonder if they will, or even if they will continue to play. While I was watching the womens' final it found it interesting to see how the Williams sisters looked. At the start Venus just looked almost as if she wasn't in it. Serena was clearly the more focused of the two, her face was stiller, she was inward-looking during the breaks and changeovers then Venus seemed to get to grips with herself and she also started to seem better focused and then she started playing better. Then about two changeovers after that it was Serena who's eyes were all over the place and who wasn't concentrating. Venus was more inward facing, and she stayed that way.

When I wasn't ebaying last week I was marking. All my students produce a folder of evidence to show that they have achieved a certain level of work. That's fine in theory but for various reasons many of the folders haven't been marked - at all. I started working with them only last month (on a short term contract) and there is work there that was handed in in September that hasn't been marked. I am the fourth teacher they have had this year, and it looks like the marking has just been left. I set the students lots of work and then sat and marked almost all day every day I was working last week, but I didn't get it all finished until yesterday. By that time I was in pain from the constant hunching over the desk and my shoulder is still sore. Of course all this means that I will have more marking to do this week as the students finish off the work they have been doing and add it to their folders as well. Oh well, end of term next week.

Himself has an appointment for laser surgery on his eye tomorrow. Scary stuff, but it's relatively minor. The problem the surgery is designed to solve was caused by him having a malignant melanoma on his retina. We were lucky that it was in a place where it affected his vision so he could get early treatment. I know a lot more about ocular melanoma than I wanted to. In fact if you'd asked me two years or so ago I wouldn't have known it even existed. All the treatment has been done on the NHS, and it couldn't have been better. This trip tomorrow will, we hope, be the last of it. Obviously he will still have to "keep and eye on it" but if all goes well he's out of the woods and with most of his sight intact. My only quibble, if you can even call it that, is that we had to travel to London for all the treatments. We managed OK but I wonder how some people could afford the trip. We go to Barts hospital and have met people there from all over the UK, some of them travel hundreds of miles to get there. It's not a cheap option but, in the end, it's just money. I don't know if there is some scheme for people to reclaim their expenses.

We drive up to the hospital from home, it's just as quick by car as by train and a whole lot cheaper - about half the price if you include the congestion charges, a bit more than half if you include car parking. People aren't going to give up their cars while that's true.

Public transport has to get a lot cheaper and more reliable and more frequent before people start using it in preference to their car. Not only that it has to go where people actually want to go. Which is one (only one) of my major objections to the new Eurostar terminal at Ebbsfleet. They are apprently using that in preference to the station at Ashford. For me to get to Ashford I can either drive or I can go by public transport. The car's quicker but at the end of a holiday there's something nice about sitting and watching the countryside pass by and not having to make a great effort. You can get to Ashford International by train from almost anywhere in the south-east. train connections to Ashford are really quite good and the old station and the International are on the same site so moving between them involves a short walk of maybe 500 ft. To get to Ebbsfleet International you almost have to go by car. There isn't a train station anywhere near. You can get a bus from Gravesend and from Dartford, but it takes a long time and doesn't go very often. From here that journey would take maybe 2 hours door to door. That's twice as long as from Ashford. To drive would take about 40 minutes. At the end of a holiday with suitcases and so on what would you rather do? You can get a bus to the railway station then a train to another station where you change trains (sometimes with quite a long wait) and then sit on that train for 50 or so minutes even if you don't have to change trains again, or you can get into your car and drive for 40 minutes. It's a bit of a no brainer really. If that applies for me, how much more so for people from further down the coast, or people who live the other side of Ashford or in Eastbourne? People who live in the area of the new station will benefit of course, but there really aren't many of them. You have to wonder who makes these decisions. Nobody I know prefers Ebbsfleet to Ashford, it's just too inconvenient.

Date posted: 09 Jul 2008

Tent Testing

The boys and I spent the weekend "camping" the quotes are because we didn't actually go any further than the back garden.

The original plan was to camp out there a couple of weeks ago, but wouldn't you know it has been wet and windy the last two weekends? So this weekend was, the first one the weather has been good enough for me to want to try it out. I mean, I don't mind camping in the wet, but it can be pretty dismal, and I didn't want to put the boys off before they'd even started properly. The plan is to spend a week camping in the English Lake District this summer, so I wanted them to be looking forward to it. They said they had a good time.

We learned a few things though - like if you take a deck of cards to entertain yourselves in the evening, it's quite a good idea to take all of them and not leave the ten of diamonds somewhere else. That caused a little disruption, but we had the jokers and a suitable substitution was made. We also learned that No.2 son can be quite brave when in need of the toilet. He woke up at 3am today, needing to go. He was in such a hurry that he just grabbed the back door key and went, without even taking the torch with him. Admittedly it wasn't far, maybe 10 feet to the back door and another six or so to the toilet, but this is the boy who tells me he has to have the light on in his room all night because he's scared of the dark. It wasn't that dark last night though, a nice clear night so we could see The Plough and lots of other stars quite clearly, plus of course there's the usual light pollution, enough to make it quite light even without stars and moon. It made me think though. If we are so desparate to save energy, why do they leave street lights on all night? Not many people are around after about 2am, and the majority of them would be in cars I'd think, so why do we need streetlights? People who live outside towns don't have lights they have torches, so why do we need streetlights in towns? Don't get me started on motorway lights. You can drive, legally, at 60mph down narrow country lanes where at any second an animal might run out in front of you and where the road surface isn't always as good as it might be, but somehow people need to have wide, straight, flat motorways to be lit by millions of lamps. Do motorway drivers not know how to use their headlights?

Talking about that reminds me of a narrow escape I had a while back on one of the country roads round here. It's a road I use quite often, runs through woodland and farmland, but is quite twisty and too narrow to merit white lines. I had been somewhere and was coming home reasonably late at night. It was dark but not as late as throwing out time at the pub, but late enough for there to be very little traffic. I have a small car, quite nippy but not designed or built for racing. As I was going along (quite quickly - I know that road very well) I noticed the lights of another car behind me, coming up fast. Turned out he was one of those drivers who drive fast but who don't manage bends very well. On the straight bits he was right close behind me but on the bends he dropped back a bit. After a couple of miles or so I was getting a bit tired of that but we were coming to the last mile of the road. Just to make a point I took one particular corner a bit quick, safely but quick. Don't think the driver behind me was very happy because as we got to the next bend he was clearly preparing to overtake me as soon as we were round. In fact, think he wasn't going to wait until we were round that bend before he passed me (I assume male here). It was his bad luck (or maybe his good luck) that as I came round the first part of the curve there was a sheep in the middle of the road, so the only thing I could do was swerve round the sheep, hold tight to the steering wheel and pray, because I knew from my mirrors and the engine noise that the driver behind me had already started to accelerate to get past and I was swerving right out in front of him. There was a squeal of brakes and sound of skidding behind me, but no crash or bang but that sheep scared the both of us rigid I think. The other car caught up with me just as we came into the edge of the town, but he stayed behind me at the legal speed limit until I turned off.

When I got home I phoned the farmer who owned the farm and told him about his sheep but I never heard anything else.

Date posted: 29 Jun 2008

The Joys of the Garden

It finally stopped raining enough for me to get out and cut the grass today. Well, this afternoon. Note that I said "cut the grass" and not "mow the lawn". There is a fairly subtle, but significant, difference there. We don't have a lawn actually, we have a football pitch, or tennis court, or water fight arena depending on what the boys want to do out there and whether there is washing out on the line. Round the edge we have a border, one side has roses, ons side is the boys "gardens" and one side has the sheds. We have three sheds, one for garden tools, on for bikes and one for himself's bits and pieces that he doesn't need or have room for in the house. There's also another one that we don't use because it is falling apart and which will hopefully disappear at some point over the summer holidays, though I suspect it will be me who makes it disappear!

Today the garden was a water fight arena for a while, once the mower was put away. While I was out there mowing No.2 son set to planting some herb seeds in containers. Basil and parsley he's planted. The seeds are pretty ancient so they may not germinate. He also planted some carrot seeds but I'm pretty sure they haven't got much of a chance - they were more buried than planted. No. 2 son's plan is that we eat some and then make some money from selling the rest. Not likely to happen really, given the size of our plot.

Next weekend the boys are I are planning a practice camp in the garden before we go off for a week camping far, far from home in August. We'll get the tent up but there won't be a lot of spare space and it's not a huge tent. 5 man tunnel basically, but it will fill up almost all the space we have. When we first got it and set it up to check that all the bits were there we had to tie one of the guy ropes onto the down pipe from the guttering. It may work better another way round. Let's hope.

There's a long story behind that tent. We bought it (well, I bought it) in about September 2006. It was end of season sale time and since the boys had been bugging me for a good couple of years to take them camping and we only had a 3-man tent (which we found leaked - at 2am we discovered this) at the time. I tell you those 3-man tents aren't fantastic space-wise. OK to sleep 1 adult and 2 kids (himself doesn't "do" camping) but only if you haven't got any luggage! Anyway, so I bought the tent, big enough for 5 people and their luggage and possibly even a chair or two. The grand plan was to go camping in the English Lake District last summer in mid-August, when himself is always up to the eyeballs at work. However, it turned out that No.2 son is a Type 1 diabetic (hence the link on this site to Diabetes UK - they are fantatsic and they don't pay me to say that or to have the link either!). He was diagnosed at the beginning of August, a week after No.1 son's birthday in fact. That was a weird thing. No.2 son wasn't well and I thought he had the symptoms of diabetes so we trundled off to the Dr. The Dr ordered some blood tests and told me it probably wasn't diabetes, no rush. The first try didn't get enough blood (son was freaking out) so we had to go back when the bruising had faded. They did the second set of blood tests (well they took the blood for them) at about 10:15. After that we went home and then went out to go to get some things for our camping trip. While we were out himself phoned. I had to take No.2 son to the local hospital right now. "Do not pass go do not collect 200 pounds". They were waiting for us at the hospital. We had to go straight to the children's ward.

No.2 son's blood sugar level was about 38 when we got it tested again in the hospital. It should be between about 5 and 7, in diabetics it's supposed to be between 4 and 11. According to the people at the hospital he should have been a very sick boy indeed, not trotting round the shops with Mum.

The hospital was great, the standard of care was second to none, I could stay with No.2 son, the whole medical team treated us with courtesy and consideration and, once they took him off the insulin drip, the boy actually enjoyed himself. We were in there for a couple of days while things were sorted out. By the time we left we had enough insulin to keep us going for a month, supplies of needles, lancets, a monitor and all sorts. The paediatric diabetic nurse did say we could still go on holiday, we'd be fine but there's a big difference between being at home 20 and minutes drive from the hospital where they know us and have all the relevant records on hand and being on a campsite in the middle of the Lakes where I'm not even sure where the nearest hospital is nor how to get there. So we didn't go. I think the boys were relieved. This year we are going (probably), one of the reasons we go is that I have family there so we visit them, but we still haven't tested out the tent properly. So next weekend that's what we are going to do.

Date posted: 08 Jun 2008

What is it about pre-pubescent boys?

Number 2 son is 12 years old tomorrow. He's very excited about his birthday. He's growing up fast in all sorts of ways. He's already quite tall, and this last years since he started secondary school he's been changing and growing almost in front of our eyes. What hasn't changed though is his reluctance to change his socks and his underpants! I seriously have to nag him about it every day. I also have to remind him to clean his teeth. I thought it was just him (or me), then I mentioned it to a friend, and her son, who is almost exactly the same age is no different when it comes to personal hygiene and clothing issues. Several other people find the same thing with their almost-teenage sons so it can't be that uncommon. I take heart from Number 1 son, who was pretty much the same when he was 12. Now he's almost 14 and he's much more aware of personal hygiene, though he's gone from one extreme to another and the smell of aftershave or cologne wafting from his room is often overpowering! Let's hope they both go for the same aftershave or I'm going to have to have serious hay fever problems.

Date posted: 04 Jun 2008

 
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